Johnny Small was very pleased with himself.  Not for any particular reason because Johnny never bothered to develop any particular talent.  No, Johnny was pleased because everyone around him was so messed up, and Johnny just loved to belittle other people, and make them seem unloved, unvalued, and insignificant.  He made terrible fat jokes about fat kids at schools.  He poked fun of those who were not good at sports (not that Johnny was a jock, but he considered that irrelevant).  He laughed at those who dressed different from him, who ate what he considered strange foods, and who just didn't meet his ideal of how a person should look, which was, of course, exactly like himself.  
    After he graduated, Johnny got a job as a disk jockey on a small radio channel.  He didn't keep the job for long because he started making insulting remarks to people who called in.  His rantings, however, were overheard by a manager from another large station that had a lot of talk shows and he saw potential in Johnny's insulting ways. 
    So Johnny Small got hired to do a radio talk show where he did little else than insult his guests and anyone else he could think of to insult.  The show was a big hit and Johnny became a big star.  His show was soon playing on channels all around the country and Johnny was making millions.  He was so impressed with himself now.  He knew all the other people were meaningless, only he was important.  Then he died.
    When Johnny arrived at the Pearly Gates, he proudly announces himself in a loud voice, "I'm Johnny Small" expecting a hero's welcome for such a famous, successful and important person.  Instead, St. Peter asked, "Johnny who?"